Ten Years
by Ms. Perception
Summary: Ten years have passed since Finn Hudson died. His funeral marked the last time all of New Directions (past and present) were in the same room at the same time. Now the gang is getting back together to celebrate Artie's film directing debut. But years old tension and drama threatens to ruin a lot more than the evening. A Blam/Pucktana story. No Puckleberry.
1. The End Where I Begin

**Summary:** Ten years have passed since Finn Hudson died. His funeral marked the last time all of New Directions (past and present) were in the same room at the same time. Now the gang is getting back together to celebrate Artie's film directing debut. But years old tension and drama threatens to ruin a lot more than the evening.

**Pairings:** Blam, Pucktana, Jarley, mentioned Finnchel, Puckleberry, Tike, Bartie, Samtana, and Klaine

**Warnings:** No real spoilers other than the obvious. Not really canon compliant.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own this show or anything related to this show.

**Author's Note:** So it's been awhile. A lot of things have happened this summer that really made me question first writing for _Glee_ and then just writing in general. Full disclosure, my mom passed away this August and it's left me a little adrift. But I've managed to find some solace in writing and I'm back with yet another story. This one isn't like my usual ones. It's my way of dealing with Finn's death. Obviously it will be very different from the show. But I needed a way to write through my feelings. Hopefully I'll have the first chapter of the sequel to _Living For the First Time_ soon. But in the meantime I hope you enjoy this one.

* * *

**At The End Is Where We Begin**

**2023 (Present)**

"San? You plan on coming out of there any time this century?"

Blaine winced at the very loud crash against the bathroom door that pretty much answered that question. He exchanged worried glances with Sam as Puck continued to talk to the obviously overly agitated Santana through the locked bathroom door. He could hear the concern in the older man's voice but he could also hear the strain and annoyance starting to come through. And if he could hear it, there was no doubt that Santana heard it too. Clearly this was not going to end well if someone didn't intervene. Blaine didn't even need to look at Sam to know that he was giving him a look, pretty much begging him to fix this. He nodded.

"Hey, bro," Sam started, cautiously stepping towards Puck. His approach was cautious as if he were approaching a rabid animal. Given the growing tension in Puck's spine, Blaine didn't think Sam's way of thought was too far from reality. "Why don't you let Blaine try for a little while?" The look he received at that suggestion was enough to make them all happy that Puck hadn't developed the ability to shoot laser beams out of his eyes. The look alone was still enough to make most grown men cry. But Sam was Sam and he only smiled brightly in the face of Puck's wrath, holding out a hand to help him to his feet. After a few tense moments, Puck took his hand and allowed Sam to pull him to his feet.

Blaine took this as his cue to take Puck's place by the door. He opted to stand but he was pretty sure that Puck wouldn't have cared if he stood or sat. Blaine watched worriedly as Puck quietly allowed Sam to lead him out of the bedroom and out to the living room where the others were waiting. Once he heard Jake's voice asking about his brother, Blaine knocked on the bathroom door.

"San, it's just me. Let me in, please?"

There was a pause and then a click. He smiled faintly and let himself into the bathroom. His worry reached new heights when he spotted the red eyed splotchy faced young woman he called a best friend for the better part of ten years sitting hunched over on the closed toilet seat.

"Oh, honey" he kneeled in front of her and gently tilted her head up so he could see her face better. "What's wrong?"

"Everything," she whimpered. "Everything I want to wear makes me look fatter than I already am. And I…. and I….. I'm hideous! My face feels like it's swollen. My feet are definitely swollen. I don't even know what's going on with my hair but it's gross. My stomach feels like it's in knots. I have to pee like all the time. Now Puck is mad at me. And we're going to be so late and Artie will hate me too. Everything is wrong!"

"Right, but why are you crying?"

"I," Santana started before closing her mouth just as quickly. Her face fell and she looked even sadder than before. "She's going to be there tonight."

"Ah," Blaine hummed, brushing away a few of her tears absently. "So what, San? I thought you were passed all the drama between you two."

"I am, or I thought I we were… but…. It's just that…. ever since Kurt told us that Rachel was coming tonight, Puck has been distant. He barely looks at me. Then I started thinking about high school today. I remembered that when he was around her, he always got this goofy look on his face. That girl could talk him into just about anything and he would do it happily. Not even Quinn could do that. Rachel has always been this huge part of his world and it's the same for her. They always revolved around each other. They have that weird Jew connection…. what if she decides that she wants that back.. that she wants _him_ back? I'm fat! She's pretty and thin. He's always loved her on some level. She's going to win."

Blaine raised an eyebrow but let her continue to rant. It was always best to let her get it out of her system, no matter how completely insane it all sounded. And the idea of Puck and Rachel getting back together was completely insane. While he didn't know the exact details, Blaine was all too aware that some seriously deep crap happened between the pair the last time they were together and they hadn't spoken to each other since then. So the idea of them suddenly deciding to throw everything they may (in Rachel's case) or definitely (in Puck's case) have away was completely ridiculous. But then again… this was Santana. A touch of crazy was her MO since high school.

"You saw her at the Tony's last month. She's like a friggin twig! She was all legs in that really super short dress that my fat ass couldn't hope to get in. And she was wearing the new Jimmy Choos that I can't afford right now much less actually fit. I'm going to lose him, Blaine."

"San, there is one very important thing that you seem to be overlooking at the moment."

"What?" she asked, pouting. Her watery brown eyes adding to the lost and hopelessly devastated effect she had going on at the moment. It made Blaine angry that somehow this woman got so damaged along the way that she thought there was even a remote chance she was going to lose in a fight against Rachel. But they were putting her together slowly, one piece at a time. And he had a feeling a very large piece of the puzzle would slot into place very, very soon.

"You're not fat," Blaine said, sliding the hand that was resting on her cheek down to the very swollen curve of her stomach. "You're pregnant, Santana. Seven months to be precise. Before that you were every bit as twiggy as Rachel and I believe that you have several pairs of Jimmy Choos and other choice heels waiting for your non pregnant feet in less than two months. Also you're trying to buy a house so that you can raise that baby of yours with your wonderful, loving and still gorgeous husband. So understandably money is a little tight at the moment. But remember that you also have several friends that are more than willing to buy you a closet full of heels if that's what it'll take to keep you happy. Because we love you. Fat ass and all."

Santana sniffled, raking a hand through her hair roughly. "God, I must look like a hot mess."

Blaine grinned. "Kind of, but you're still gorgeous. And your husband knows that. He loves you and the mini Pucktana."

Santana let out a breathy laugh, placing her own hand on her stomach. A small smile lit up her face as they both felt the baby move, responding to her mother's familiar touch. "I thought I told you to stop calling her that, Hogwarts. Her name is Maya."

"Maya what?"

"Maya Elizabeth Lopez-Puckerman."

"Damn right. The way I see it, there is currently only one Mrs. Puckerman. I don't think the good Mr. Puckerman has any intentions on changing that. If he was going to divorce you, I think he would've done it four years ago after the year was up."

"Yeah," Santana nodded. She closed her eyes and when they reopened a moment later, the desperate sadness was gone. In its place was the strong, confidant woman he adored above all others. He pressed a kiss against her forehead.

"That's my girl. Now let's fix your makeup, find something to show off that beautiful baby bump and go reassure your husband that you haven't gone completely insane."

Santana laughed allowing Blaine to help her up. "I love you, Hogwarts."

"Love you more, Satan." He tapped her on the nose in a gesture that never failed to make her giggle. He wasn't disappointed tonight either. He wasn't lying when he said the woman was gorgeous. And she seemingly got better looking with age. Even her imaginary pregnancy woes weren't affecting her looks. She just got even more curves and more swag in her walk. No, she definitely had nothing to worry about when it came to keeping her husband. Puck hadn't so much as looked at another woman in the four years since they'd both been actually committed to their marriage. Blaine was willing to bet that Puck wasn't exactly looking in that first year either.

Forty minutes later, they finally made their way downstairs. Blaine hid a smile at the strangely adorable sight of Jake and Puck pacing in unison. He knew the pacing was more for the older Puckerman's benefit this time but it was a gesture the brothers both used when it felt like they were going to climb out of their skin. Santana stopped on the bottom step and cleared her throat gently. Puck's pacing grinded to an immediate stop.

"San?"

"Hi," she mumbled, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "You ready to go?"

Puck gave her a weak smile. "We don't have to go tonight. I'm sure Artie will understand."

"Yeah, he probably would," Santana conceded. "But that doesn't make it right. We need to go. Blaine and I spent the better part of an hour trying to make sure everything fit in this dress while your offspring felt the need to kick me repeatedly in the kidney. We're going. We need to have one last night of socializing before Maya turns us into reclusive weirdoes."

Puck's smile grew as he crossed the floor to stand in front of her. He cupped her face gently and Blaine knew that she wasn't missing the love in his eyes. Hell he could see it and it wasn't even directed at him!

"I love you so much, Santana. I need you to know that. I've never regretted a single part of us. Ever."

"Not even the morning after our wedding when the hangover set in?"

"Ok, so maybe that was the one thing I regretted," Puck admitted with a smile to match Santana's. "That was a hell of a hangover. But it was worth it for the last five years."

Jake snorted with a fond smile. "Only you two could get drunk in Vegas, get married on a dare, stay married on a dare and actually end up with a functionally adorable marriage."

"Don't be jealous, little brother. You and Marley are kind of cute together," Puck teased, easing Santana into his arms. Santana hit him on the arm but didn't seem to be struggling away from the embrace. Blaine watched as the last of the lingering doubts and fears bled out, replaced by the love and affection that kept the Lopez-Puckerman union going strong four years after everyone was sure they were going to call it quits. But they were still going strong…. And they weren't the only ones.

"You did good," a voice whispered against the shell of his ear. Blaine leaned back into the arms wound tightly around his waist. Six years together and Sam's voice still gave him chills. "You think Artie would be really mad if we were late?'

Blaine smiled lazily even as Sam continued to brush his lips against his ears. "Mmm, we're already late."

"Later," Sam chuckled.

"Dammit, this is why I should've rode ahead with Marley, Ryder and the others. The old people are coupling up on me. Again!" Jake griped. The two couples shared a laugh at his mock outrage before finally mobilizing towards the front door. The tears and fears of earlier were gone, replaced with laughter and the love of family and friends…. Just as it was always meant to be.

* * *

**November 2013**

"I don't know why I keep letting you talk me into this!" Puck muttered as he tuned his guitar. He paused in his task to throw wary looks in the direction of the stage. Blaine didn't blame him. He wasn't sure what to call the sounds coming out of the throat of the woman on stage but it sure as hell wasn't singing. Some people really should keep that to their showers where they were least likely to offend actual singer's ears.

But that's what happened when you combined alcohol and a microphone. Everyone thought they were the next American Idol when they had a few drinks in them. The Moonlight Sonata Bar offered free drinks to anyone brave enough to step up to the mic. Blaine just wished the policy would restrict that until AFTER they performed. Otherwise, you got well… this.

"I don't know," Sam murmured, resting his chin on his hands. "It's almost like she's doing a mash up. It's like a mix between Britney Spears and the voices inside her drunken head. It's interesting." He titled his head towards Puck. "It's going to be hard following a class act like that, bro."

"I hate you, Sammy."

"I know you think you do," Sam grinned. "Admit it. You enjoy it. If you didn't, you wouldn't agree to these stupid bets. Especially the ones where you know you were going to lose anyway. You like losing because it gives you an excuse to do the Open Mic thing and pretend that you don't like it."

Puck's only answer to Sam's very accurate assessment was to fling his guitar pick at the blonde. Blaine smirked. "He's right," the former Warbler pointed out. "You know you like this as much as you complain. I don't know why you don't just take Derek's offer to make this a permanent thing."

"Because it's weird," Puck replied, not denying that he in fact did enjoy performing. "I bartend three nights out of the week and then I'm supposed to perform too? I'd be the singing bartender. How gimmicky is that?"

"Dude, you already _are_ the singing bartender," Sam retorted. "You sing pretty much every Open Mic night when I manage to 'trick you' into making a stupid bet with me where the loser has to perform."

Puck rolled his eyes but made no further comment. He instead threw himself into further maintenance of his guitar. The guitar that Blaine and Sam both knew was perfectly tuned. The guitar they all knew was perfectly tuned but Puck needed the distraction. And they allowed him to take it. That was the nature of their friendship now. They knew Puck wasn't as tough as he tried to be. And they let him know that he didn't need to try to be tough. It was still a work in progress.

"Well, well, if it's not my favorite bartender!"

"Hey, Derek," Puck greeted, not turning away from his guitar even at the feel of Derek's hand on his shoulder. Blaine marveled at how easily Derek got past the barriers that Puck built to keep everyone out. Or maybe it was just that barriers were gone. A lot changed since… Finn. Puck was just one of the many changes.

"You look tired, kid," Derek continued, sitting at their table. He nodded in greeting to Sam and Blaine and they nodded in return. "You sleeping ok?"

"Yeah," Puck sighed, finally looking away from his guitar. "Just been thinking about this trip back home. It's going to be weird."

"Yeah, I know. But you're strong, no matter what you think. You've been through some really rough stuff and you're still here. I know you can do this. It's just one little holiday. Less than a week back there and then boom you're back in civilization again. And you tell that brother of yours he better be spending his winter break up here."

Puck grinned. "Trust me, Jake already has his bags packed. He's beyond looking forward to this."

"Excellent. If he's half as good as you all say he is, then he better be performing Open Mic night too. We might even manage to persuade your buddies over here. We could bill it as Lima, Ohio Night."

"Aw, you going to give us our own night," Sam cooed. Derek stretched a long arm across the table to ruffle Sam's hair, earning an indignant squeal of protest and a grin

"Not just you three anymore. I have a new waitress. Just started today actually. She's one of the students from my continuing education program. I keep trying to tell her to matriculate into the fulltime program. She's better than some of my regular students."

"Hey," Blaine protested.

"I said some, not all. You know you're one of the special ones, stop fishing for praise. All three of you are even though Sammy here would rather waste that natural talent he has on working with children." Sam stuck out his tongue. "Why I bother with you, I'll never know."

"Because we're a package deal," Sam countered with a grin. "You take Puck, you take all of us."

Blaine nodded in agreement. It was the same tired argument that Sam and Derek had every single time they were together (which was more often than pretty much five nights out of the week). Blaine knew that Derek adored all of them (even if Puck was clearly his favorite). Blaine appreciated that the man took an interest in them. Truthfully, the move to New York was hard. As if being independent and on their own in a huge city like New York wasn't intimidating enough, there was still the raw, still healing wound left behind by the loss of one of their own just two months before they made the move. And despite appearances, Blaine knew that both he and Sam were all too aware of how close they came to losing another. Unconsciously his eyes darted back to Puck again. The older teen was once again lost in the world of his guitar, tuning out Derek and Sam's bickering.

Blaine listened to them for a few more minutes before letting his thoughts wander again. When he first met Derek DeLaurentis, he was only his slightly insane but interesting professor. He didn't know what Derek saw in him during that first meeting but he invited Blaine to his club that evening. Blaine took Sam and Puck along with him. Whatever Derek saw in Blaine, he found in the other two and he hadn't let them too far out of his sight since then. It was… comforting honestly.

"So where's the latest stray anyway?" Sam asked, twirling the straw in his soda. The downside of being friends with the bar's owner and the bartender is that they both wanted to keep their jobs. That meant that the grossly underage Sam and Blaine, who couldn't pass for anything other than their actual ages, were often drinking rum and coke…without the rum.

"She's around," Derek waved a vague hand in the direction of the crowded lounge. "She's getting the tutorial from Ali."

Blaine grimaced. He wasn't surprised to see similar looks from Puck and Sam, though Puck's expression was mixed with disbelief. "You trying to get rid of the new girl already? I thought you were trying to adopt her."

"I am," Derek replied. "Ali has seniority around here. She's in charge of training all new staff that come through here."

"Except the ones that you actually want to keep," Blaine countered. The fact that Ali didn't train Puck and wasn't allowed to really interact with him much during the times that they were both working remained unspoken. Allison "Ali" Young was, putting it mildly, a nightmare inducing shrew from Hell. Blaine had a theory that Ali wasn't truly happy unless she was causing someone horrible mental pain and anguish. Apparently she wasn't always that way but a nasty breakup with Derek's younger brother apparently sparked a change she had yet to come back from... five years later.

"I thought about it," Derek admitted. "But I've got a good feeling about this new girl. She reminds me of you, Puckerman. She's got a spark about her. Hard to tell under all the damage but she's a bright one. If anyone can survive Ali, it's this one."

The three Lima transplants exchanged glances before shrugging. Derek was constantly coming up with crazy schemes (acting as the unofficial den mother to a bunch of lost, struggling teenagers and young adults somehow being the least insane) and they had yet to backfire. Besides if someone could tame the shrew, well then they would be well accepted by not only Blaine, Sam and Puck but pretty much all of the staff and patrons of the Moonlit Sonata.

A comfortable silence fell over the table as they settled in and listened to the next act. At least this one was slightly better than the last act. Seriously, this was way different than karaoke. Why did everyone and their mother think they could perform in front of a crowd? Actually better question, why did everyone and their mother think they should perform in front of a crowd. Blaine seriously couldn't wait until Puck got through the petulant brooding part of the evening and went up there and showed everyone how it was supposed to be done. He also held out the hope that Derek would keep working his magic and convince Puck to join NYADA too.

"Boss, we got a little bit of a situation." Blaine turned his attention away from the stage to Isaac Reed, the other bartender. He was only a few years older than them. He was also one of Derek's strays. The man specialized in collecting the broken and the damaged. And somehow he fixed them. He made them somewhat better. Isaac went from being an aggressive, self-destructing, painfully insecure teenager with a history of abuse to a smiling, confident young adult in a committed and sickeningly healthy relationship (with Derek's little brother) who was also working on his masters in psychology. Blaine had hope for Puck when he looked at Isaac.

Right now, said source of hope was draped over the back of the chair he dragged up between Derek and Puck. To say that there was supposedly a problem, he was the epitome of calm. Even as he studied the older man, there was a smirk pulling at his lips.

"Your words say there's a problem but your mouth is saying there isn't," Derek pointed out, smiling at the very first of his lost children.

"I guess it depends on your definition of a situation," Isaac clarified with a wider smirk. "You know how you got the newbie training with Ali, right?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, let's just say it's ended in tears way earlier than expected. Dylan is currently trying to talk her out of the women's bathroom. There's a line forming outside and I think it's going to be awhile before Dylan gets her out of there. It doesn't help that Erica and Lydia are taking bets on how long she's going to be hiding out versus how long it takes for Scott to lose his patience and just break down the damn door."

"Ali's already scared the new girl?" Puck gaped. "It's been like an hour. That's a new record." He turned an accusing look on Derek. "And she reminds you of me?!"

Isaac swatted Puck on the shoulder. "I didn't say that Ali scared the new girl. The new girl scared Ali. Dylan is currently trying, and failing, to talk Ali out the bathroom. I don't think she'll be out any time soon though. New girl ripped her a new one. It was kind of awesome. Don't worry, Scott took video." Puck looked relieved while Derek smiled thoughtfully. "So just wondering, boss man, what are we supposed to do?"

Derek craned his neck to assess the length of the line outside the locked bathroom door. He pursed his lips. "If she's not out by the time the line reaches the stairs, you have my permission to send Scott in there to harass her until she leaves. You can also post the verbal takedown on YouTube. But only after you let us see."

Isaac grinned, blue eyes twinkling. "And what should I do about the newbie? She's a little shaken up right now. Think she's worried about getting fired."

"Hell no, she's getting a raise," Derek grinned. "Anyone that can reduce Ali to sobbing in the bathroom is worth keeping around."

"And this is why I'm so glad your mom totally loves me and you'll be disowned if you fire me," Isaac shook his head. "Anyway, I'm sending New Girl over here. She's not going to believe that she's not getting fired. She keeps babbling about having to move back home because she can't afford to lose the only job she's got since moving here."

"Be nice," Derek warned. "And remember you can only taunt Allison if the line gets too long."

"You kill all my fun."

"I try," Derek admitted. Isaac rolled his eyes before reaching over to pluck Puck on the arm.

"Lydia put you down next. You better bring your A game too. She's bought a few of her Alpha Beta Omega sorority sisters over and she's convinced that's she going to find your future wife out of one of them. She's getting her 'psychic vibes' again. She's convinced that your future wife is here"

Puck pulled a face. "I changed my mind. I'm not going." Isaac grinned before slipping away from the table and back into the crowd. "He's joking, right?"

Blaine and Sam both threw him a pointed look. Lydia was another one of Derek's kids. She was also just as enamored with Puck as Derek was. She took one look at him and decided that it was her life's mission to find the perfect woman for him. Corralling her sorority sisters for Open Mic Night was the least invasive thing she'd done in her pursuit to find Puck's life partner.

"I'm so not going up there," Puck moaned, burying his face in his guitar. Sam reached across the table to pat him on the shoulder with mock sympathy. Almost as if he could see the grin playing across Sam's lips, Puck held up his middle finger. Blaine rolled his eyes at his best friends' antics and started to say something but the words died on his lips as Isaac reappeared with the new Allison shaming waitress in tow.

"In my defense, she started it," the girl said by way of introduction. She paid no attention to the three teenagers at the table, her entire focus on Derek. "She was being a bitch and I couldn't take it. I'm really sorry, Derek. I understand if you have to let me go but I really hope you don't because I can barely afford my really ghetto apartment as it is and everything is really shit right now so please don't fire me. This is probably the only good thing I've got going for me right now."

Blaine blinked, not only at the impressive word vomit but also at the woman standing before them. It was hard to believe that only seven months passed since they last saw her. True, he knew that he, Sam and Puck were not the only Lima, Ohio residents in New York City but the trio had regular meetups with their fellow McKinley alumni. There were only two that dropped off the radar. And one of them was standing in front of them, with her hands on her hips, looking desperate and broken.

The strange tableau of pleading waitress, understanding boss, shocked teenage males and highly amused Isaac was broken by a throat clearing loudly into the microphone on stage. "Alright, ladies and gents, but especially my ladies, it's about that time. What time, you ask?" Lydia Whitmore asked, playing coy. "Time for the Moonlit Sonata's very own Noah Puckerman to grace us with his musical presence. And yes, ladies, he is single and looking."

Puck let out a strangled yelp as two things happened simultaneously. A spotlight (no doubt the handiwork of Scott) was suddenly on him as was the full attention of the newest addition to the Moonlit Sonata staff. Her eyes were wide as she looked between her three former classmates… her three former friends. A shaky hand covered her mouth as she continued to look between them.

"I'm going to go out on a limb here and assume you all know each other," Isaac said, tracking their awkward movements.

"Santana?" Sam finally broke the strange silent stare down they had going on. "What are you…?" Sam trailed off as Puck suddenly dropped his guitar and bolted from the table. "Puck?!"

"Uh, it seems as though there will be a slight delay in that musical presence," Lydia stammered, watching Puck disappear up the stairs leading to the exit. She made a complicated gesture with her hand and suddenly music was filling the dead silence left behind. It didn't take longer than that for Lydia to march off the stage and over to their table. "What the hell is going on? Where did Puck just run off to? Better question, why did Puck just run off? And why are both Sam and Blaine staring at the new girl like she's a ghost or something?"

"In what order would you like us to answer those questions" Isaac snarked in her direction.

"In the order that will involve the least amount of pain for everyone here," Lydia replied.

"Right," Blaine said, running a hand over his face. "We, uh, all know each other. We went to high school together."

"I graduated the year before them," Santana added. "I graduated with Puck."

Derek let out a quiet sigh as he started to put the story together based on the information that he no doubt weaseled out of Puck at some point during the four months he was working at the bar. He sat back in his seat, letting out another more audible sigh.

"I see," Derek finally said. "So this is the girl?"

"No," Sam shook his head. His eyes were hard as he looked at Santana. "This is the roommate of the girl."

"Former," Santana corrected. "Former roommate of Rachel Berry. Current roommate of well no one." She gave an awkward looking shrug and a forced smile.

"What happened?" Blaine asked.

"About a month after the funeral, she started getting weird. With Kurt back home, it was up to me to keep her from spiraling out of control. It wasn't enough. She… uh, she left me. She packed up and moved out. Don't ask where because I haven't talked to her since then. And now here we are."

"No, Blaine," Sam blurted out before anyone could say anything further. "I'm going to go find Puck, talk him down and then we're going home. Just the three of us." There was an audible throat clearing behind him. "Ok, just the three of us and the rest of the overprotective crew over here. That's all. Leave the stray collection to Derek. No more roommates."

With that said, Sam was pushing away from the table and stalking away with Lydia and Isaac hard on his heels. Blaine chewed on his lip absently. Sam was quite clear on his feelings on the subject. Then again, Sam was probably the only other person besides Rachel and Puck to know what happened between them the night of Finn's funeral. Whatever it was devastated Puck to the point where they were only now starting to see signs of the friend they used to know. Clearly Puck associated Santana with Rachel and really didn't want to be around her. So really the best thing to do would be to let this go. To push the idea out of his mind and definitely not speak it out loud.

"You know, Santana, we have an extra room at our apartment."

Her brow furrowed as she glanced between Blaine and the last place they saw Sam. "You want me to move in with you? With all three of you?"

"Yeah, it could be good."

"I don't really think Sam or Puck would agree with you on that?"

Blaine shrugged. "Let me talk to them. I promise, it's going to be fine."

* * *

"Are you out of your mind?! Like seriously, did you bump your head and just completely lose complete control over your senses? You actually asked Santana to move in with us?"

Blaine shifted in his seat and continued to stare blankly at his best friend. The blonde was furiously pacing back and forth in the spacious confines of their apartment's living room. After the offer was made to Santana, Blaine followed after his friends. After collecting Puck from whatever alley he picked to wallow in his misery, they walked the short distance to their apartment. Isaac and Lydia had left a few minutes ago but only after assuring themselves and the rest of the Sonata staff that Puck was not in danger of doing something stupid like quitting. And that's when Blaine let his offer to Santana slip.

"I don't see what the big deal is," Blaine countered. "It's not like I asked Rachel to move in. Now that would be a problem."

"But Rachel is Santana's best friend. Santana took Rachel's side in this whole thing."

"Yeah, and look where that got her. She's on her own. She's alone."

"Maybe…."

"So help me, Sam Evans, if you say maybe she deserves that," Blaine cut him off, letting the threat hang in the air. He glared at his best friend before continuing. "I also seem to remember when you asked me to let someone move in with us and that hasn't blown up in our face!" Blaine pointed out with a raised eyebrow. Sam's gaze slid guiltily to Puck before returning to Blaine.

"That was different and you know it."

"How, Sam? How is this any different? One of our friends needed help and we gave it," Blaine countered. "Santana needs help and we're going to give it. Besides it's not like I'm not saying she moves in forever. Just let her stay here until she gets back on her feet and can find some place better than the projects in Red Hook."

Sam ran a hand through his hair in exasperation. "How long is that supposed to be?"

"As long as it takes," Puck chimed in. Both Blaine and Sam looked to the older boy sprawled across the couch opposite from them. "No matter what happened, she's still family. She's still a gleek."

"But…."

"But nothing, Sammy. You know it's true. She's on her own now too. She's worse than we were. At least we had each other. Also it's not exactly inconveniencing us. We do have a whole extra room that we never use and had no intentions of ever using."

Sam huffed, finally flopping down onto the sofa with Puck. He elbowed the older boy. "You're seriously ok with this? After everything that went down, you're really ok with Santana moving in?"

Puck rolled his eyes. "Yes, dude. I swear. After everything that went down, I'm really ok with Santana moving in. A lot of shitty things have gone down this year. I'm not going to add Santana totally getting murder raped to that list."

Blaine watched as the two people he somehow referred to as best friends engaged in a silent battle of wills. He knew that there was a lot more to the whole Puck suddenly coming with them to New York decision that Sam sprung on him last minute. He knew that something truly life altering and messed up happened between Puck and Rachel after the funeral. But he also knew that was a line he wasn't going to cross. Sam had it handled and it seemed to be holding up… reasonably well. So instead he sat back in the armchair and watched as every single argument Sam could've had against Santana moving in crumbled against Puck's steadfast recommendation in her favor.

"Ugh, I hate you two!" Sam groaned, tilting over so that he was leaning into Puck's side. The older teen grinned slightly and patted the blonde on the head. "I would just like to go on record by saying I told you so. Because there is no way that this is not going to end terribly. Like literally there is no way this won't end in tears."

* * *

*The end for now. My plan is to go back and forth between the "present" and the "past" to show how they call came to be the way that they are at the moment. Hope you all enjoyed! Until next time!


	2. Loneliness Has Always Been a Friend

**Summary:** Ten years have passed since Finn Hudson died. His funeral marked the last time all of New Directions (past and present) were in the same room at the same time. Now the gang is getting back together to celebrate Artie's film directing debut. But decades old tension and drama threatens to ruin a lot more than the evening.

**Pairings:** Blam, Pucktana, Jarley, Rachel/OC. Past Finnchel, Puckleberry, Tike, Bartie, Samtana, and Klaine pairings.

**Warnings:** No real spoilers other than the obvious. Not really canon compliant.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own this show or anything related to this show.

**Author's Note:** So it's been awhile. Sorry for the delay. Real life hit me hard. Started a new job, woohoo! And then I watched 'The Quarterback' and I kind of lost inspiration a little bit. But I'm back. I hope you enjoy. This chapter was pretty hard to write because of some of the feelings. But hopefully you'll enjoy. Thanks.

* * *

**Loneliness Has Always Been a Friend of Mine**

**2023 (Present)**

"Babe, you seen my shoes?"

Rachel sighed. "Which shoes, Jeremy? You have enough shoes in here for a small shoeless nation. Also how many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me 'babe'?"

A head of dark hair peered around the corner of the bedroom she shared with her costar turned boyfriend. A pair of beautiful grey eyes followed behind coupled with a sheepish grin and she couldn't help the smile that pulled at her own lips at the sight. But the smile faded as quickly as it came when she was reminded of yet another pair of lips that quirked into an adorable, heart melting smile.

"Where do you go?"

She blinked when she realized he was no longer standing in the doorway but rather in front of her. He was giving her that look again. It was a look she was all too familiar with in the two years they'd been dating. It was the look that clearly wondered when she was going to let him in. It was an answer she was still trying to find.

"I didn't go anywhere," she said behind a somewhat false smile. "And you never answered my question. Which shoes are you looking for? And…."

"How many times have you asked me to stop calling you babe," he filled in her for her. He leaned closer, placing a soft kiss on her forehead. "It's not my fault that you're a total babe, Rachel Berry."

"You get a pass because you're going with me to this thing tonight," she pointed at him, still fighting a grin. "But after tonight, the word babe is banished from your vocabulary, ok?"

"I don't see what the big deal is," he muttered, even as he disappeared into their walk-in closet. It was one of the things she loved best about this apartment, even if most of the closet was filled with his shoes. Sometime she really wondered who the diva in this relationship really was.

"The big deal is that it's an archaic word meant to…."

"No," he replied, looking at her around the corner of the closet. "Why is tonight such a big deal? We do these industry things all the time. You weren't even this nervous when we were going to the Tony's."

"I'm not nervous."

"Rach, that's the third dress you've put on in the past twenty minutes," Jeremy explained patiently. "And for the record, I like this one best. It shows off the legs." He smiled. "You know how much I love your legs."

She flushed though two years had given her a sort of immunity to his comments. "I know. So do all the readers of _Broadway Times_. Did you have to give an entire interview about me?"

"What can I say?" Jeremy grinned. "I'm your biggest fan." He stepped forward so that he was once again standing before her. "And stop trying to change the subject. Why are you nervous about tonight?"

She closed her eyes and sighed. "It's not the event so much as the people."

"Yeah, how did we score an invite to this thing tonight? Kristen Rolland almost lost her damn mind last week when I told her we were going. Apparently this movie blew up at the last Sundance Festival. So everyone was trying to get into this screening but only you and I are going. So what did you do to get those tickets?"

"I joined a glee club in high school," Rachel suggested with a weak smile. Jeremy raised an eyebrow. She sighed again, dragging him to sit down on the bed. She then pulled a large, flat box from underneath their bed. As she lifted the lid there was one item in particular that stood out. It was a thick photo album. She placed it on Jeremy's lap and flipped through the well-worn pages until she found the one in particular she was looking for. She tapped it and looked up to meet his gaze. "Look familiar?"

"No way," Jeremy gasped, bending closer to the picture. "You knew Arthur Abrams? You actually went to school with the guy everyone is calling the hottest new director in the business. You know this movie we're supposed to see is already rumored to be Oscar bait. This guy is blowing up and you went to school with him?!"

"Yes, I went to school with him. We were in glee club together. I should've known that he'd choose directing as his passion. He was so good with the school plays," Rachel smiled sadly. "So yes, I knew him but it was a very long time ago."

"But if he invited you then everything is ok, right?"

"I sincerely doubt it was a personal invitation or out of some desire to see me. He invited everyone from the glee club. Artie, Arthur, graduated the year after I did. He invited everyone from my graduating class as well as his own and a few of the younger glee club members that joined during his last year. So I guess that I am a little nervous about tonight. It's been awhile since I've seen some of them. Things didn't go so well the last time we were all together."

Jeremy gently took her hand, letting their fingers entangle and silently offering her strength. "So why bother to go at all?"

It was a good question. One she'd been struggling with all night. She didn't know why she was so determined to go tonight. Based off the admittedly limited contact she had with most of the gleeks over the past ten years, she knew she was not the most popular person tonight. But still… not going just didn't appear to be an option. She had to go.

"The person I am today is… different than how I was back then. Back then… when we were in high school… we were the freaks, the outcasts. But when we were all together, performing together, it felt like we were something more. Like maybe we didn't suck as much as everyone said we did. They were like my family. And it's been ten years since I've seen them all together. I have to go." She paused. "I have to go for him."

"Ah, the boyfriend."

Rachel nodded. She turned another page in the album to one of the graduating seniors just a few days before graduation. She felt the tears stinging in her eyes as she looked at the group. They were so young and so painfully unaware of everything that life was going to throw their way in less than a year. Mercedes, Quinn and Kurt were giggling about something. She remembered they could barely contain their laughter as they waited for Blaine to snap the shot. Puck and Mike were both trying to give Santana bunny ears behind her back. It was obvious Santana knew and just didn't care given the bright happy smile on her face. And then there was Glee's golden couple. They were the only two not bothering to pose for the camera. Finn was holding onto her waist lightly with his forehead resting against her. The picture Rachel was wearing a bright smile of her own and her arms were wound around his shoulders, holding him close. But not close enough. Never close enough.

"That's him, huh?" Jeremy asked, quietly.

"Yes, that's Finn."

"Always kind of wondered what he looked like," Jeremy mused. "I wanted to know who was so amazing that he's still got a piece of you even though he's been gone for years." He paused. "He's really tall." Rachel couldn't help the giggle that erupted almost against her will.

"He was very tall. Artie, and occasionally Noah, used to call him Gigantor. But Finn always took it in stride. He didn't really care. That's just how he was."

Jeremy nodded slowly. "Rachel, you know that I love you, right?"

"Of course."

"Then trust me when I say that you're right, you do need to go tonight," he continued. "You need to go because you need to get some closure. Sometimes I feel like even though you're with me, you're not actually with me. And I don't know if it's because you're still waiting for Finn or if it's because you miss your friends but it's something. I've gotten more information about your life before New York in the past two minutes than I have in two years. I just need you to promise me one thing."

"What?"

"That I don't have anything to worry about tonight."

"Anything like what?"

"Like you reconnecting with a long lost love and running off into the sunset with him."

Rachel forced a smile. "I don't think you have anything to worry about. I'm not ready to run away with ghosts just yet."

"Finn was the only one? There was no one else?"

"It was only Finn. No one else," she forced a smile. Her eyes lingered on the photo. The group was immortalized at their happiest. Her gaze landed on one in particular. She wanted to remember him that way. With that familiar smirk on his lips, hazel eyes glinting in the sunlight. She wanted to forget the way she last saw him. With shiny eyes swimming with hurt, guilt and regret. Feelings that drove him to do the unthinkable the very next night. She hadn't spoken to him. The few times she'd been to the apartment to see Santana and Blaine, Sam and Puck were nowhere to be found. Tonight would be the first time in ten years that she was going to face Noah Puckerman.

"So I'm the one you're coming home to tonight?" Jeremy's voice dragged her out of her thoughts. She looked up to meet his concerned gaze.

"Silly," she kissed his lips quickly. "Of course, it's you."

His clear grey eyes searched hers for a moment before a smile curved his lips. "Ok, then. I'm not really ready to be another one of your ex's, Rach. I just hope tonight will give you that closure. That after tonight I can actually have all of you."

'Me too,' she thought as he resumed his search for his ever elusive shoes. She brushed her fingertips over the picture one more time before slamming the cover shut. One way or another tonight was going to be interesting.

* * *

**November 2013**

This was going to be an interesting ride. Honestly she had second (and third, fourth and fifth) thoughts about taking the plane ride home after… well everything. But at the last minute, Rachel sucked it up, packed a bag and made the trip from her new apartment to LaGuardia airport. She, Santana and Kurt had bought the tickets a long time ago. Before everything went straight to hell. Kurt cashed his ticket in a few months ago. He was already in Ohio. There really wasn't a point in him keeping the ticket when he was already there. So that only left her… and Santana. And this is where things were bound to get interesting.

Rachel hadn't actually seen or talked to Santana in going on two months. She was aware that she may have handled the situation poorly. She did just disappear without any hint of a warning. But she was confident that a few hours together on a plane would help to ease the hurt feelings. She knew that she and Santana could get past this. Kurt had somewhat forgiven her. She knew that once she had Santana back on her side, she would conquer the last of Kurt's anger and they could go back to being the invincible trio.

In preparation for her epic apology fest, Rachel made Santana's favorite cupcakes complete with 'I'm Sorry' frosting on top. Then she remembered that she wouldn't be allowed to bring them on the plane, so instead she took a picture and printed it out on a card that said "I Owe You." With the card safely in her purse, Rachel felt ready to reconnect with one of her dearest friends. The thought that Santana would do anything other than forgive her just never occurred to her. She was Rachel Barbra Berry. She was taking control of her life again. She wasn't going to let tragedy redefine who she was. She was going to get past this. And she wasn't going to do it alone…. Except maybe she was.

It was an hour until take off and there was no sign of Santana anywhere. The Latina was a lot of things but late was not one of them. She always enjoyed getting to the airport early so she could sit back and enjoy watching the TSA agents aggressively search passengers. She said it was the closest thing to porn she was going to get to enjoy in public. So Rachel knew for certain she would find the girl sitting as close to the security station as she could without rousing suspicions about her behavior. But yet she wasn't there. She also wasn't at the gate. She was starting to get worried.

That worry turned to hurt and not a little anger when they finally boarded and she headed to her seat only to find someone who decidedly not Santana and very much male sitting in the seat by the window. The seat that Santana threatened bodily harm and the immediate relinquishing of their friendship if she didn't get it. Rachel, of course, gave it up pretty quickly. So that's why she was terribly surprised to see someone who was not Santana sitting there.

"Excuse me," Rachel started, taking her seat beside the man. "I think you have the wrong seat. This belongs to my friend."

The man gave her an apprising look before handing her his boarding pass. Josh Lucas, Row 12D. Rachel shook her head. Because no, that wasn't right. Clearly that seat belonged to Santana. They bought the tickets together. Santana was 12D, she was 12C and Kurt's was right across the aisle in 12B. But Kurt wasn't here because Kurt was already in Ohio. And Santana wasn't here because…. Rachel didn't know. She handed Josh back his boarding pass and sank down in her seat. This was going to be a long, crappy flight. And someone owed her a damn explanation because what the hell?

Three hours and a layover in Chicago later, Rachel was marching up to the one person who could give her the explanation that she needed… that she deserved.

"Kurt, what the hell? Where's Santana? I ended up sitting next to this creepy pervert who kept staring at my breasts the entire flight," Rachel hissed as she caught up with her best friend by the baggage claim area.

"Hello to you too, Rachel," Kurt replied, dryly. "It's so nice to see you too. It's been great catching up with you too after a two month long silence."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry. I know I dropped off the radar a little bit but I just needed some space. That's why I came home, Kurt. So I could apologize to you and to Santana and try to get things back the way they used to be."

Kurt gave her a sad look. "Rachel, things are never going back to the way they used to be. Don't you get that? Things are different now."

"But we're not different, right?" she asked in a small voice. "We're still going to conquer New York, right?"

"Honey, I don't know when I'm coming back to New York. Right now, Dad and Carole… they need me. And honestly, I need them. I'm so grateful to NYADA but I've deferred them for the year. I'm staying here for now."

Rachel felt the familiar sting of tears in her eyes. She knew when she left him after the funeral that there would be a chance that this would happen… but she hoped. She hoped that the five months would be enough to help him heal enough to move on and move back. But now he was telling her that he was staying. He wasn't coming back. But maybe he just needed more time. He'd be back. He had to comeback. He just had to. She didn't know how she was going to get through this life without Finn without her two best friends.

"Right, well do you need Santana and I to ship any of your stuff back?"

Kurt gave her another look. This one was less sad and more "do you even listen to yourself talk sometimes". She raised an eyebrow in response. "Rachel, Santana shipped all of my stuff back last month when she moved out of the apartment."

"She moved out? Why?!"

"Seriously? We could barely afford that thing between the three of us. How did you think Santana was going to afford to stay there on her own?"

Rachel's eyes widened. She really hadn't factored that into her decision to leave that day. She just woke up one morning in that apartment that was full of memories. There were all the pictures of the glee club, of her and Finn together, and just everything. It was all too much. So she packed up as much as she could and she left. She went to the one person in New York who wouldn't remind her of Finn at all. Brody was good like that. But never once did she imagine not coming back to their wonderful loft.

"I didn't think….." she trailed off. "Where is she staying now?"

"For a few weeks, she was living in some slum in Red Hook," Kurt replied, starting the walk to his car. Rachel opened her mouth to protest. "Yeah, I know. I thought the same thing. But when she called to tell me she wasn't coming back for Thanksgiving, she told me that she found three new roommates. They have a place in Manhattan near the bar where she's working. She didn't go into a lot of detail but she said she was better off there. She's with them for Thanksgiving."

"Oh," Rachel said, climbing into Kurt's car. She didn't bother fiddling with the radio as he pulled out of the airport. And she noticed that Kurt wasn't in a rush to start talking to her either. A heavy silence settled over the two best friends and Rachel idly wondered when this wall was built between the two of them. They'd been best friends since they were juniors in high school. But it seemed like broken friendships was the theme of the day.

A small part of her was angry. How dare Santana give up their apartment? How dare she not at least try to find Rachel to try figure out a way to keep it? How dare she not come home for the holidays? When they graduated, they promised they would all be home for the holidays.

"Don't you dare," Kurt warned. "Don't you dare sit over there and believe you have any right to be angry with Santana. You left her with no choice but to move out. She was miserable the last few times I talked to her. She was even thinking about moving back here. So don't you dare sit over there and act like this was in any way shape or form not your fault."

"Kurt!"

"Don't Kurt me, Rachel. You know what you did was wrong. You disappeared. No one knew where you went. It was only after we called your fathers that we knew you were at least safe, although I question that since you're living with Brody. But whatever."

"She should've called me," Rachel protested. "I would've sent her the money."

"You really don't get what you did, do you? Like you honestly just don't see how this is your fault. We tried, Rachel. We all did. We tried to be understanding. We tried to be patient because you just lost the love of your life. But all you did was push us away. And with Santana, you literally shoved her away. And for the record, she did call. Several times. So did I."

Rachel shifted in her seat. Why couldn't they understand where she was coming from? Why didn't they understand? Why couldn't they see how hard this was? That every day without him was a struggle. She had a hard time relating to people before. And now? She felt like she was at a complete loss. She didn't know how to handle any of this. She just wanted to crawl into another hole. She found herself missing the nest of blankets that Brody built for her on his sofa. Talking to her friends and hearing them tell her that she was wrong was too hard. Too real.

"Do you really think this is what Finn would want for you?"

"It doesn't really matter what he wants for me, does it? He's gone," her voice cracked on the last word. The stinging was back. "He left me. So what he wants doesn't really matter."

Kurt sighed heavily but let the conversation die. It wasn't until he finally pulled up in front of her house that he spoke again. "Rachel, I love you. You know that. So know that what I'm about to say to you comes from a place of love." Rachel nodded hesitantly. "Finn left all of us. He left me, our parents and all of the gleeks. We all lost him. And yet you're the only one pushing everyone away. Get over yourself." He let out another shaky breath. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?"

"Really? You didn't even call your fathers?" Kurt sighed. "They're leaving tonight. Carole wants you to come over for dinner tomorrow. She didn't want to you be alone. Too bad you didn't have that consideration for Santana. So again, see you tomorrow."

Rachel gave another shaky nod and let herself out the car. She had barely pulled her small travel bag out of the trunk before Kurt was speeding off. She let out a deep breath before making her way up the driveway. She was about to ring the doorbell when the door swung open.

"Rachel," Leroy smiled in surprise. "I was hoping we would see you before we left."

"You're leaving?" she asked, in a small voice. "But it's Thanksgiving."

"Pumpkin," Hiram started, as he entered the room. He swept his daughter into a hug before leaning back to look her in the eye. "We called you a few times to talk about your plans for Thanksgiving but you never said if you were coming home or not. It's been so stressful around here lately that your Dad and I decided to take a mini vacation."

Rachel chewed on her lip. "I'm sorry."

"Oh, honey," Hiram held her tighter. "I know it's been really hard for you these past few months. But it's going to get better, I promise. And we'll do better. How about Christmas in New York? You get to show your dads around the City that Never Sleeps."

Rachel smiled a little. "That does sound like a lot of fun," she whispered. She took a deep breath and mustered a wider smile. "You and Dad have a great trip and I'll see you next month."

Leroy watched worriedly from the doorway. "Rachel, we don't have to go. We can cancel our trip if you want."

"No," Rachel shook her head. "You and Daddy deserve to have some fun and be happy. So enjoy your trip and I'll see you in December."

Leroy sighed. "Alright, princess, if you insist. But you call us if you need anything. I mean anything. And say hello to the Hummel's for us tomorrow. Give our best to Carole and tell her we'll be in touch when we get back."

Rachel nodded and hugged him tightly. "I love you, Dad. Have a safe trip."

"See you later, Pumpkin," Hiram placed a gentle kiss to her forehead before guiding his husband out the door. Rachel locked the door behind them and took another deep breath.

"Well, it's certainly been interesting," she muttered. "On a bright side, can't get any worse than this."

* * *

The sad thing about saying that things couldn't get worse, is that things always found a way of biting you in the ass and being much worse. When she arrived at the Hudson-Hummel household the next afternoon, she found that she wasn't the only former gleek that was staying for dinner. She had just finished being smothered in tears, hugs and kisses from Carole Hummel when she came across the other guest. Seven months passed since she last saw him and clearly those months were good to him.

"Sam," she smiled. His eyes widened in surprised before shutting down altogether.

"Rachel," he tipped his head in her direction before excusing himself to see if Carole needed any more help with dinner.

"What was that about?" she asked Kurt, who was lingering in the doorway.

"No idea," Kurt replied. He gave her a look out the corner of his eye. "About yesterday…."

"You're not going to yell at me anymore, are you?"

"No, I should not have attacked you like that. I was just frustrated. And I miss him too."

"I know," she wrapped her arms around his waist. "I'm sorry I've been difficult. Friends?"

"Forever," Kurt promised. Rachel smiled brightly feeling lighter than she had in hours. Maybe, just maybe, this trip wouldn't be such a depressing ordeal after all.

"So Sam. How is New York?" Burt asked, once they were all settled down for dinner. Rachel raised an eyebrow and looked over at Kurt, who seemed surprised as well. Sam was living in New York? Since when?

"It's big," the blonde replied, with a small laugh. "It's a little intimidating, not going to lie. Especially not having any family around. But it's not as bad as it would be if I was out there on my own. So Blaine and Puck serve a purpose after all."

Burt and Sam both laughed while Carole fondly shook her head. Rachel was still reeling from the Sam being in New York part that she almost missed that last part. Almost. Fortunately, Kurt did not.

"You're living with Blaine?!"

"And Puck."

"And Puck?"

"Oh, and apparently as of last week, Santana too," Sam groused.

"Wait, you're one of the three roommates she moved in with?"

"She's already talking about us," Sam mused. "Cool. And yes, she moved in last week. She was living in some crap apartment in the really, really bad part of Brooklyn. So Blaine forced her to move in with us and here we are."

Rachel blinked. She knew that Blaine was moving to New York after he graduated. She also knew that he and Sam had gotten closer during their senior year but she didn't know they were that close. Close enough that he would move all the way to New York just to be there for his best friend. And what was with Puck and now Santana living with them? She didn't even know the four of them got along.

"So I guess Blaine is doing well then," Kurt said, haltingly. "He's happy?"

"He has the same phone number," Sam answered with a slight smile. "If you want to know how he's doing, you can always give him a call."

"Yes, I suppose I could," Kurt replied, looking a bit uncomfortable. Rachel couldn't help but smile a little. Now he knew what it felt like to have someone hit you with a few uncomfortable truths. Still she couldn't help but hope that Kurt would get his act together soon. He and Blaine were totally meant to be. Just like her… and Finn.

She was prepared for the lump that lodged itself in her throat this time. But it wasn't Finn's face that she saw when she closed her eyes. It was Puck. She hadn't seen him since right after the funeral. Since she said all those awful things to him. She cleared her throat as if trying to dislodge the guilt she could feel building there. She opened her eyes as the conversation shifted towards what they were all doing with their post high school lives.

She knew Kurt was taking classes at the state university in journalism. Sam, as she learned, was also taking classes at Hunter College in education. He wanted to be a teacher. He sometimes worked at the same bar as Puck waiting on tables and doing inventory on odd nights when the other staff called out. He was mostly focusing on school. Rachel was interested, she really was. She had no idea that Sam wanted to be a teacher. But she was mostly interested in hearing about Puck. What was he doing working at a bar? Was that all he was doing? She wanted to know more but Carole and Burt seemed content with the little bit of information they were given. It was frustrating.

An hour later, she got the chance she was looking for. After dinner was over, Kurt and Carole went in the kitchen to start working on the dishes and Burt excused himself to take a plate over to their elderly neighbor leaving Rachel and Sam alone on one of the long sofas in the living room. Some football game was on in the background, but neither she nor Sam was paying it any attention. Sam was occupied with texting someone on his phone while Rachel was contemplating how to go about asking about Puck without seeming really obvious.

"How is he?" she blurted out. Well, so much for subtlety. "Noah, I mean. How is he?"

Sam tensed, looking up from his phone to give her an incredulous look. "You're kidding, right?" Rachel winced. So much for what happened between them staying between them.

"Look, Sam, I'm sorry for what I said to him, but I just….."

"If you even remotely think that saying sorry takes away what you said then you're clearly more delusional than I thought."

Rachel swallowed. "What did Noah tell you about that night?"

"He didn't tell me anything, Rachel. I was there. I heard you! I heard you blame him for Finn's death. I heard you say that you wish it was Puck instead because he didn't have anyone that would miss him like Finn did."

Rachel shuddered. She knew everything she said was wrong when she said it but it was so easy to blame Puck. He was always with Finn. And the one night that he wasn't….. She was angry. She wanted someone to hurt like she did. And Puck was there. He was always there for her to use how she needed. That night wasn't any different. She knew she hurt him but she just couldn't work up the courage to apologize. Truthfully, the final push towards making the trip home was the hope that she would run into him and begin to repair their friendship. But instead she was facing his roommate. His very angry roommate.

"I didn't…."

"You what? You didn't mean to hurt him? Because that's a damn lie. What did you think was going to happen? You do remember that Puck and Finn were best friends since they were kids, right? You do know that Puck has just as much right to be upset about Finn being dead as you do. Well we all do. He was our friend too."

"I'm sorry!" Rachel cried, wiping away her tears angrily. "Ok? Is that what you want to hear?"

Sam scoffed. "No, not really. I don't really care either way to be honest. I can't speak for the others. For some reason, Blaine and even Santana still want to be friends with you. I can't imagine why but it's up to them. But stay away from me and from Puck. I've worked too damn hard to get him back to normal to let you hurt him again. Finn's gone, so it's my job to be there for him now. I take those things seriously, Rachel. I can't let you hurt him like that again."

Rachel's jaw dropped. "Sam, I'm so sorry. I know it doesn't take back everything I said but…. I was wrong. I know that. I really do. I was just hurting and Noah was there. I never meant to really hurt him."

"And yet, you did," Sam replied, simply.

Any further discussion was put on hold by his phone loudly ringing. He tore his angry gaze away from Rachel to look down at the caller id. His green eyes softened immediately and a bright smile pulled at his lips. Rachel hadn't seen him smile that way since Brittany. Was it possible that he found a new girlfriend? He pressed the talk button and answered immediately.

"Hey, geek."

_ "Hey, nerd." _

The voice on the other end came through clearly seeing as how they were still sitting pretty close together on the sofa. Sam didn't seem to care that she was listening in. Or rather he didn't seem to notice as the whole of his attention was on the phone. Rachel's brow furrowed at the voice on the other end of the line. That was definitely not a girl. It was also really familiar. Wait, was that Blaine?

"How's the circus back home?"

"_Awesome. The apartment has been invaded by the whole Sonata crew and a little Puckerman!"_

"Great. So Jake and his mom made it ok?"

_"Yeah. They made it. Things are going crazy as you can imagine. I just figured you'd want to hear some of the madness. We miss you."_

Sam sighed sadly. "I miss you guys too." He toyed with the edge of his shirt. "Kurt asked about you today."

_"Really?"_ Rachel could hear the excitement in his tone. But it didn't match up with the blank look on Sam's face.

"Yeah, dude. He asked about you. So looks like you might still have an in after all."

"_You're the best,"_ Blaine gushed. "_You're even worth the cookies I had to smuggle and hide in my room."_

"Lydia made cookies?"

_"Even better… Isaac made cookies."_

"I'm coming back tonight!" Sam laughed. "All jokes and delicious cookies aside, how is everything? How's the newest stray fitting in?"

_"San is doing fine actually. Not surprisingly, Lydia has taken to her. Something about now having a mini alpha female around. Whatever that means. Girls are scary even to gay men. Isaac and Scott have yet to stop making out all over the place. Dylan, Ali and Erica are apparently running some kind of gambling ring in the living room with the football game. Derek and Tanisha have declared the kitchen off limits and are trying to pretend that they're actually sane adults. But we all know the truth."_

Sam grinned. "And how's Puck?"

_"Puck and Jake are the absolute worst. Since you're not here to distract them, they both got their hands on their guitars and are now playing dueling guitars and only talking in really bad southern accents. It's kind of scary. Especially they insist on telling anyone that tells them to shut up that they're going to make them squeal like a pig."_

"Oh, my god, that sounds like so much fun right now," Sam sighed. "You better have saved more than just cookies."

_"I didn't but Derek did. He insisted that we set aside a whole thing of leftovers for you." _

"Oh, Derek cooked?"

_"Yup. Derek and Tanisha cooked while Isaac and Lydia made dessert. Lydia made that chocolate cake. You know the one that makes us want to crawl inside the cake and live there forever." _

"Oh my god, save me some, please?"

_"Already done. I'm hiding it in my room."_

"You're the best. Love you, bro!"

"_See, Puck, I'm the best!"_ Blaine shouted. There was a muffled retort that had Blaine dramatically gasping. _"I'm going to punch whoever let you watch _Deliverance. _Wait… Sam! Hurry you ass back here so I can kill you for letting our resident social deviant watch that movie…without me!"_

Sam snorted. "Yeah, I'm leaving in the morning. I should be back by tomorrow night."

_"Awesome, we'll see you then."_

"Bye," Sam hung up with a wistful smile. He paused when he noticed Rachel watching him with an arched eyebrow. "What?"

"Nothing. Nothing at all."

He narrowed his eyes but didn't say anything more. A few minutes later, Carole came back in the kitchen with enough leftovers packed for him and his roommates. He gave her a hug and a kiss and was out the door. Off to his very colorful and fun life in New York with Blaine and Santana and Puck and all of their friends. She tried not to be jealous. She tried not to feel hurt but she couldn't help it.

She pushed them all away. She thought being around them would hurt too much. But at the same time, they were all she knew. They were the only friends in the world she had and she threw them away. Now she didn't have Finn and she didn't have her friends. She had nothing.

"Rachel, honey, what's wrong?" Kurt asked. He sat down on the couch taking Sam's abandoned seat beside her.

"I screwed up," she whispered, aware of the tears streaming down her face. "I messed up everything. I lost everything."

"Oh, no, honey," Kurt said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder. "Things are messed up. But it's nothing we can't fix. I think it's safe to say that we've been through some stuff and yet we've all managed to stay connected, right? So why should this stop us?"

Rachel nodded, running a hand through her hair. "What happened to Noah after the funeral? You didn't know he was in New York either. What happened to him?"

Kurt frowned. "I don't really know the whole story. I only know what I've overheard. But I know that the night after the funeral, Puck was rushed to the hospital. Sam and Blaine were both there. Blaine wouldn't tell me anything though. But he seemed really upset. Like really upset. And then he was gone. I ran into Jake a few months ago and I asked about Puck. He wouldn't tell me anything either. But from what I heard from Tina and Marley, I think Puck might've tried to…."

Rachel felt her breath catch in her throat. She now had all the pieces and it was all forming one very ugly picture. No wonder Sam hated her. She was starting to hate herself a little. She forced Santana to move into one of the worst neighborhoods in New York. She hurt Puck so bad he thought that killing himself was the best option. She was putting stress on Kurt every day by having him defend her selfish actions. Not to mention what she was doing to her own fathers. She was so busy mourning Finn and being lost in her own grief that she forgot that she wasn't the only one grieving.

"How do I fix this?" Rachel asked. "What do I do?"

"Try to reach out to them. Try and rebuild those connections. It's not a lost cause, just a difficult one. And those are the ones worth fighting for."

Rachel nodded, reaching for her phone. She scrolled through the contacts until she found the one she was looking for. 'Happy Thanksgiving. I want you to know that I'm thankful for you and your friendship. I love you. I'm sorry.' She met Kurt's approving gaze before she hit send.

It would be another two days and a lot of anxiety before she received a response. But at least it came and it filled her with more hope than she had in months.

'Don't be such a girl. We'll talk soon.'

It wasn't perfect. But it was a start.

* * *

*The end for now.


	3. And I Know I Did Damage…

**Summary:** Ten years have passed since Finn Hudson died. His funeral marked the last time all of New Directions (past and present) were in the same room at the same time. Now the gang is getting back together to celebrate Artie's film directing debut. But decades old tension and drama threatens to ruin a lot more than the evening.

**Pairings:** Blam, Pucktana, Jarley, Rachel/OC, Kartie, Ryley. Past Finnchel, Puckleberry, Tike, Bartie, Samtana, and Klaine pairings. Pucktana/Blam, Puckerwilde and Hummelberry friendships.

**Warnings:** No real spoilers other than the obvious. Not really canon compliant.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own this show or anything related to this show.

**Author's Note:** So as I was outlining how I want this story to go, I realized that chapter wise it was going to be pretty short story. Only about five chapters and there was going to be a lot of skipping ahead. So I changed it up a little bit. This is a short little interlude and some insight into what's happening with the gang in the times that we'll be skipping through. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

* * *

**And I Know I Did Damage…. Cause the Look in Your Eyes Is Killing Me **

**August 2014 **

Well, he really did it this time. He screwed up. There was no way of sugarcoating it or making it easier to deal with. The truth was that he, Jake Puckerman, completely and irrevocably screwed up _everything_. He knew it was mistake sleeping with Bree before he did but he let his hormones and his own ridiculous self-sabotaging ways ruin what was somehow an actually great relationship. He hurt the one person in the world he never wanted to hurt. Ever. All because he couldn't keep it in his pants. Marley was worth waiting for. And now he would never get that chance again. Because it was over. She found someone else. Someone better.

Jake glanced down at his phone and the message that sent him seeking solitude on the rooftop of his brother's apartment building. 'Marley Rose is in a relationship with Ryder Lynn.' He wanted to be angry. He wanted to hate them both…. But he couldn't. This was his fault. He was the one that cheated on her. He couldn't blame her for moving on. He couldn't even blame Ryder for stepping in. Ryder was always interested in Marley and he proved from the beginning that he was probably the better guy out of the two of them. At least, Ryder was the one least likely to cheat. Marley deserved romance and sweetness and Ryder would give her what she needed. Ryder could be the boyfriend she deserved. Jake closed his eyes, letting his head rest against the brick wall behind him.

He could feel the warm rays from the setting sun settle over his skin soothing the jagged and raw emotional wounds. Sometimes he really wondered why he even bothered. He never lasted long in relationships. All the old insecurities would creep in and make him wonder… how long? How long until she finds something better? So he always found a way to sabotage things before they got to that point. But Marley was the first person he thought he could break the cycle with. Marley was the first good thing to happen to him in a while and now she was gone. Most of the glee club (sadly his only real friends in town) hated him for cheating with Bree. His mother was disappointed in him. He really had nothing. Well, that wasn't exactly true. He did have….

"Hey."

He cracked an eye open to find a pair of familiar eyes watching him carefully. When they first met, Jake thought Puck looked more like their father than he did. But now he knew better. Their father would never smile with all the patience and understanding in the world if Jake gave him attitude. His father would never give him a simple look that could make him feel protected and loved without even saying a word. Most importantly his father never looked like he could stay. Puck never left him. Not even when Jake was his most obnoxious and bratty. Puck stayed. Even when he thought he wasn't wanted. Even when Puck wanted to leave, he stayed because Jake asked him to stay.

"Hi," Jake finally replied. Puck crouched down in front of him. Under the sun's muted rays, his brother's hazel eyes looked more brown than green. They almost resembled Jake's. Now all he had to do was grow an afro. Couldn't be worse than the not at all missed Mohawk. He laughed at the thought.

"What?" Puck asked warily.

"Just trying to picture you with a 'fro."

Puck pulled an exaggerated face. "Yeah, let's just leave that look to you, little brother." He plopped down beside the younger Puckerman and stretched out his legs. He leaned into Jake's side. "You ok?"

"You saw?"

"Yeah, never got around to unfriending them," Puck shrugged. Jake was privately touched. He knew that Puck only added the new couple for his sake back when they were his girlfriend and best friend. That he would even think about unfriending them like they were the one in the wrong… Jake really liked this big brother thing sometimes. "Sucks, dude."

"Yeah, it really does. But he's good for her, you know? He's a good guy. He's sweet. She deserves that. She deserves better than me at least."

"Same thing I told myself when Rachel dumped me on the bleachers when we were sophomores."

Jake turned to look at his brother. That was the first time Puck ever actually acknowledged dating Rachel in the past. Of course Jake knew they did. He got the whole information dump on the original New Directions when he first joined. He also got to hear about Puckleberry and how he and Marley were apparently the 2.0 of that. That should've been his sign right then. He should've known it wasn't going to end well for him and Marley based off history. He shouldn't have even bothered.

"Dude, I'm not going to yell at you because Kitty just showed up and I'm pretty sure that's what she's here for. I am just going to remind you that you're my little brother. That means that I support your decision no matter what. Yes, you screwed up big time. But you're still a kid, bro. I promise you that _this_ is not the end of everything."

Jake lowered his eyes, staring at the phone again. "But…. I blew it. I ruined everything with Marley. The rest of the glee club hates me. Mom is pissed at me for screwing up my grades with all the drama going on. Everything is horrible back there. The only reason I've been even slightly happy is because I'm here. If I go back there I have to see Marley and Ryder being perfect… and together. And feel everyone hating me." He let out a shaky breath. "I don't know if I can deal with that, bro."

Puck put an arm around Jake's shoulders and pulled him in close. Jake didn't even worry about how it looked. He just drew from the silent comfort. "It's up to you. I talked it out with your mom. She acknowledged that you did go to summer school here and you did pretty damn good. She's willing to let you move in with me for your senior year. San, Sammy and Blaine are all cool with it too. But Jake… seriously. I want you to think about it, ok? I know going back seems hard but… you're not Dad. You've never run away before. Why start now?"

"Maybe I should've. Maybe I should've stayed far away from New Directions. I thought I could do it. You know? Prove to everyone that I wasn't a screw up like Dad. That you and Mike and just everyone were right to believe in me. But…. I don't know. It's like I tried so hard to be what I thought I was supposed to be, to do what I supposed to do, that I got lost and fucked it all up. Now I don't know what to do."

"Well for starters, you said that you were trying to be who everyone wanted you to be, right?" Jake nodded. "Well, stop," Puck replied, squeezing his shoulders lightly. "Stop trying to be who everyone thinks you should be and just be Jake. Jake is pretty dope. I say this not only as his brother but also as someone proud to be considered his friend too. You're pretty amazing, little brother. I think it's time you let people other than your family see that. Just be the real you and everything will work out."

"How do you know?"

"Worked for me," Puck grinned. "When I first decided I didn't want to be Noah anymore, it was to protect me from getting hurt by people. But all I really did was hide the fact that I was hurting. A lot. And it led to me making a lot of crap life choices. I see that now. About three hundred hours of therapy later, but I get it." They both laughed quietly. "I got a second chance and I decided to do it right. It doesn't seem so bad anymore… this living thing."

Jake lifted his gaze to really study his brother. Though he tried his best to forget those dark days surrounding Puck's hospitalization, Jake found they still played an active role in his really bad nightmares. That guy with his sunken in eyes and quiet voice was a far cry from the impulsive and boisterous teen that had them singing and dancing on the Paramount Studios lot before getting matching tattoos. And even now, a little over a year later, this version of his brother still seemed very different. But in a good way. He was centered. He smiled and it reached his eyes. For the first time since they met, it seemed like his brother was happy. Maybe he had a point. Maybe there was something to this whole be yourself concept.

"Uh oh," Puck muttered, looking down at his own phone. Jake raised an eyebrow. The older Puckerman managed to look both apologetic and sheepish. "Santana couldn't hold her back anymore. Apparently she threatened Sam's POP figures collection and he gave up." Jake swallowed nervously, scrambling to his feet just as the stairwell door crashed open. Both Puckerman's winced.

"What the actual hell, Mini Puckerman?" Kitty yelled as she stormed across the roof to crowd him against the wall. Jake was dimly aware of Puck shuffling away. He didn't leave but he definitely wasn't offering to run interference. Jerk. "You're staying?! Since when was that the freaking plan?!"

"What am I going back for?" Jake asked. "Everyone hates me. No one would miss me." And god didn't that sound scarily familiar? He made a mental note to apologize to Puck for yelling at him when he said those exact same words in the hospital last year. Clearly self-deprecation and obliviousness to your own self worth was a genetic trait.

"Ahem, I believe that it's pretty obvious that I would!" Kitty reminded him. "I thought this summer was proof of that." Jake sighed. She had a point.

When he left Lima on the last day of school with a heavy heart and dark thoughts, he never thought that he would find a best friend in Kitty Wilde. He never imagined he would want to spend the summer running around New York with the cheerleader much less enjoy it. But actually he enjoyed the hell out of it. They left on the same train. Kitty was going to spend the summer with Artie while Jake was getting as far away from Lima as possible. Knowing that it was inevitable that they were going to cross paths with one another was the only reason they agreed to sit by one another on the train.

The long train ride gave Jake a chance to get to know his ex-girlfriend in ways that he hadn't bothered to when they were actually dating. And that was a shame because Kitty was actually pretty awesome. Not so awesome that she didn't pause midway through their bonding journey to bitch him out for cheating on her friend. But she also didn't hate him. She sympathized with him. She saw what he did for what it really was and not just as an attack on Marley. She listened to him and she didn't judge. In the wake of pretty much all of New Directions turning against him, that felt pretty amazing. He was actually sad to see her leave with Artie because he knew that it would be over the next time they met.

He was pretty sure that he wouldn't see Kitty again until they were forced to hang out due to his brother and her boyfriend's semiweekly gatherings. He didn't mind really. He was there to do summer school and prove to his mother (and himself) that he wasn't a total screw up. She was there to spend time with Artie and check out colleges, not play therapist to Jake's damaged psyche and wounded pride. But she surprised him by calling him the very next day and demanding that he keep her company when he got done with classes.

For the next two months they fell into a familiar pattern. She would spend the time that he was in classes reading on her Kindle and then they would explore the city and some colleges until Artie got out of work. Then they would go to the Moonlit Sonata where his brother worked (or at least that what Puck claimed to do. Really it seemed like a whole lot of sitting around and goofing off). They settled into a pattern and Jake started to forget all about Lima and the problems he left behind. And then it all came crashing back in the form of a stupid Facebook post. He couldn't go back there. He couldn't face the music. Maybe he was just like his father.

"Oh my god, Jake, you're acting like you're the only person in the world that's ever made a mistake! Newsflash, you're not. Yes, you screwed up big time but so what? You're seventeen and a boy. You're bound to screw up. But the thing that makes you a real man is going back and dealing with the consequences of your mistakes. You're always talking about being stuck with the Puckerman name but I think you're looking at the wrong Puckerman. The one that you should be trying to live up to is the one that wouldn't turn his back on his friends, no matter what. That's the real Puckerman legacy. And you are a real Puckerman."

He met her eyes for the first time since she started this tirade. He wasn't surprised to see that they were glassy. He learned early into this strange friendship they built that Kitty wore her emotions pretty close to the surface. You just needed to learn to look underneath the layers of sarcasm and disdain. He learned. He had the time and more importantly she was worth it.

"Jake, you can't do this. You can't leave me to go back to that god forsaken wasteland of a town. I adore Marley. She's sweet in a sickening English orphan kind of way but I need you. You're the only other one that will tell Schuester that his ideas are crap. And you're the only other one with any kind of edge in that group now. I can't do this without you."

Jake nodded, taking her hand in his. "I know."

"So let's make a deal," Kitty smiled softly. "We go back and finish what we started. Get through senior year and then we come back where we both belong."

Jake couldn't fight the smile that pulled at his lips. "Together?"

"Always, babe," she grinned. "This is where we belong. I know it. But not yet. We need to finish this. Besides we still have to win Nationals. You want to break your brother's record, right? We won last year. We're going to win again."

Puck scoffed from somewhere in the background but both teens ignored him. Jake turned the words over in his head. What she said fit with Puck's advice. It would be hard… but not impossible. Yeah, he screwed up. But he was young and he was human. He was also very sorry. He was going to go back and face his friends and deal with the fallout. He was going to prove to his mother that he was nothing like his father. And he was going to do it all with Kitty by his side. They were going to stick together and maybe emerge from this whole thing with their sanity intact. Provided of course that Mr. Schuester didn't feel the need to ever require a musical number with twerking again. That was… just wrong. Although Puck and Santana's amusing commentary on all the things wrong with Will and his ongoing midlife crisis was kind of worth the abject humiliation after the fact.

"Is it safe?" Sam's voice called from across from the roof. "Everyone is alive and in one piece? No more threatening to smash Darth Vader and Superman?"

Kitty laughed letting go of Jake's hand to brush away the few tears that managed to escape. "No, your dolls are safe, nerd."

"Only Blaine gets to call me that," Sam retorted as he and Santana walked out the stairwell to join the trio already on the roof. Santana bumped her hip against Kitty while ruffling Jake's hair as she passed by. He mock growled in her direction.

"Oh, you missed the memo," Kitty said with a grin. "Blaine told me I'm allowed to call you that in his absence. He said he didn't want you to feel left out."

"He wouldn't say that….." Sam trailed off with a frown. "Would he?"

Puck laughed quietly. He leaned forward so that his head was resting on his knees. "Where is Hogwarts anyway? He's been MIA all week."

"He's on yet another date with Kurt," Santana supplied, dropping down to sit beside Puck. Sam pulled a face while Santana laughed in agreement. "They're kind of disgusting with this whole rekindled love thing. Plus it's severely cramping our BFF time. I'm not a fan."

"It's not going to last," Puck murmured, staring out at the city. "Blaine is different than he was when we were in high school. We all are. I think they're both trying to pretend but it's not going to work out." He looked back at Sam with a knowing smile. "So stop pouting, Blaine will all be yours soon enough."

Sam rolled his eyes sitting next to Puck. "I have no idea what you're talking about. I don't mind the whole Kurt and Blaine thing. Blaine is happy. He deserves that. So yeah if he wants to be with Kurt that's fine." Jake really thought he protested too much. Puck did too if the small snort coming from his direction was any indication. Sam glared, elbowing Puck in the side. "I don't know why I even bother with any of you."

"Admit it, you love us," Santana teased.

"Love has nothing to do with this conversation."

"Actually I think you'll find that love has everything to do with this conversation. Especially the love between two best friends turned….." Puck grunted as Sam elbowed him harder in the ribs.

Kitty giggled and nudged Jake. "Promise me that we won't turn out like them when we get to be that old."

"Hey!"

Jake laughed. In the beginning, he wanted to avoid being compared to his brother but at the same time he fell into the same patterns his brother did. He made the same mistakes his brother made. He was starting to think that he really was doomed to be Noah Puckerman 2.0. But as he watched his brother smiling and happy sitting between two people who loved him, Jake couldn't help but wonder why that would be such a bad thing. Sure he had a crazy few years as a teenager but here he was in a stable if not questionable job. (Seriously, he like never worked). He was getting ready to start classes at NYADA on some scholarship that Jake was certain Derek pulled out of his ass. And most importantly, he was happy. Jake didn't mind being like that.

He looked down at his phone and the infamous message. It would be hard but he would deal. He tapped the screen and added a comment. 'I'm happy for you both. Congrats.' And surprisingly he really meant it. He knew he blew it with Marley. He probably would never get a second chance with her and that was ok. Looking at it realistically, romances born within that, as Kitty put it, Jesus and love forsaken choir room rarely ever actually worked out. Rachel and Finn were the best chance at success and that ended tragically. Blaine and Kurt were the next voted most likely to succeed and well…. Jake was inclined to agree with his brother. He knew Blaine without Kurt and he liked Blaine without Kurt. He was different when he was with Kurt and eventually he'd figure that out. Probably not without a little help but Jake was confident that Puck had that handled. Maybe Kitty and Artie would break the streak. Actually, he took that back. Kitty and Artie were definitely going to break the streak. They were an unlikely couple and they had that working for them.

"Crap, San, we're going to be late for work."

"Uh, Puck, what exactly is your job there anyway? I mean most of the time you're just sitting around hanging out with us," Kitty pointed out. Jake nodded in agreement.

"I'm the bartender."

"Then what's Isaac?"

"The other bartender?"

"How many drinks per night do you actually make?" Puck opened his mouth to reply but Kitty cut him off. "Drinks for your friends don't count."

"Then none."

"Right, so I ask again. What's your job again?"

"Sitting at the bar and looking hot," Santana replied with a grin. Puck narrowed his eyes. "What? It's true. Derek so lets you guys get away with everything because you totally attract the gay men and desperate and lonely straight female crowd. That's why he lets Isaac and Scott practically mate on the bar. It's good for business. Bossman is smart. He knows his audience."

"You think I'm hot?"

"Out of all the wrong she just said that's your takeaway?" Sam shook his head. "But seriously, San, I thought you were Lebanese."

"What can I say?" Santana shrugged. "I appreciate all beauty, no matter the gender. Besides I think it's difficult to put a label on things. I think there's too much of me to tie to one gender."

"Well said," Puck agreed, holding his hand out for a fist bump, that of course Santana returned. Sometimes Jake wondered why they just didn't end up together. They were literally the same person in two different bodies.

"Seriously, promise me we won't be that weird when we get old," Kitty pleaded.

Jake nodded though he knew his attempt at being serious was ruined when he couldn't fight the urge to laugh. Things wouldn't be easy when he went back to Lima. He knew that he had a lot of work to do to set things right. But he would. He would make things right and then he would go home where he belonged. His home was in New York City with Puck and his crazy friends and his weird, not a real job-job. And he knew he would have Kitty by his side the whole time. Heused to think that Ryder was his best friend, and maybe he was at the time. But Kitty was his real best friend. They weren't hanging together out of some mutual crush of the same girl. They were hanging together because they actually enjoyed each other's company. So yeah, when he really thought about it things weren't so bad.

He was going to be just fine.

* * *

*I pretty much wrote this chapter to address the whole Jake cheating thing. Mostly because it just seemed so completely out of leftfield (as do most of the characters who cheat on this show). But then again a lot of things on that show seem out of left field these days. It's really becoming a struggle to watch this show and that's so unfair. I used to look forward to a new episode and now…. Sigh. Well, mini rant over. Hope you enjoyed this little interlude. I'm already working on the next chapter so hopefully only about a week or so for that one.

P.S. I noticed that some people are confused about the timing of this story. Uh, let's just say that it's definitely not canon compliant. I have no idea what's going on with the timeline in the show and I'm not trying to stay true to it at all. So suffice to say that I'm acting as if this current season is taking place in a different school year. So Season 4 was sophomore year for Jake. Season 5 is his junior year. This interlude (2014) takes place right before his senior year. So I hope that helps to clear up some of the confusion about timelines and stuff.


End file.
